||[Jun. 18th, 2009|01:44 pm]
The Big Creepy Gaijin
|[||Song Currently Stuck in my Head
|||||Kick Axe - Hunger||]|
OK, so occasionally there's a topic or news story that gets so many people talking about in on their webpages (because they're webpages, not blogs, you pretentious cocksuckers - web 2 point 0, my left nut) that LJ sends out emails offering big cash awards to people who mention them.*
Today's topic, as you've probably guessed, is that big election hoo-ha over in Persia. Oh, excuse me, Iran. And you're probably wondering, what's his opinion? What kind of crackpot rant is he gonna go on this time? Will there be ice cream?
The answer is no.
Because I don't really give half a flying fuck.
"But how can you not care?," you ask. "People are suffering and dying over there!" The answer is simple: I don't care because it doesn't affect me or anyone in my monkeysphere. People suffer and die every second of every minute of every day, because the world is not a nice place. Beautiful, mysterious, magnificent, wondrous...but not nice. It's made of blood and stone and shit and dirt, and most people can't handle that.
Hey, at least I'm honest. A good 80% of the people twittering their brains out over this issue will forget about it and move on when the press tells them what they should be outraged about next week.
Besides, I have confidence in the Persians. If they've got even the tiniest shred of their ancestors in them - the ancestors who fuckstomped their way across half a continent and were the absolute terrors of the ancient world - then they'll do alright. If people want to revolt, I say give them guns. Thomas Jefferson was on the money there.
...Well, crap. I guess there was a crackpot rant in there after all. Free ice cream for everybody!!
*=For legal purposes I should probably state that LJ does not actually do this. But in case any of the admins are reading, it's definitely an idea deserving of consideration.